just alisha things

So that time of the year has rolled around again where we excitedly welcome in a new year and leave the previous one behind (in this case, with a great sigh of relief). For many, the arrival of a new year marks the beginning of a fresh start and turning over a new leaf, but not me. I absolutely hate January. I’m not sure where this loathing for January originated, but I can tell you that I’ve felt this way for quite a long time. It’s a mixture of things, for one I hate saying goodbye to the festive season and taking the Christmas tree down. Everything feels so bare without the homely twinkling of Christmas lights and the smell of poinsettia candles. I’m left eating the last of the premium Yule Log from M&S as the depressing reality of returning to work looms on the horizon. Then there’s the fact I usually get sick in January. I make it through the majority of winter without any illnesses and think I got away with it, before being struck down with an awful cold for almost the entirety of January. Then, finally, there’s the situation of New Year’s resolutions, a concept I have never gotten along with.

For many years I’ve gone through the ordeal of setting myself outrageous New Year’s resolutions and failing four days in to January. Drink three litres of water a day, go to the gym five times a week, read 100 books by the end of the year. It’s almost like I knew I had no intention of fulfilling these goals but setting them in itself made me feel like that was the start to becoming “a better person”. Well, I think it’s time to put this idea to bed. Don’t get me wrong, I think there’s nothing wrong with wanting to better ourselves and set goals for the future, but we have got to stop giving ourselves a time limit to accomplish these goals when the reality is, we spend our whole lives constantly changing, learning and adapting. Why do we do it to ourselves? We won’t magically be the best version of ourselves after a year of unnecessary pressure, so in turn we end up feeling like a failure by the time the year draws to a close. Then we do it again – “I will definitely get through more than five books this year, and I’ll restart my gym membership!” And so, the vicious cycle continues.

Apparently New Year’s resolutions originated about four thousand years ago, which in itself should surely show that it’s time to kick this shitty tradition to the curb. It’d take me about four thousand years to get my arse to the gym five times a week.

Maybe I’m being pessimistic on this one, and I do admit that I usually don’t like change, which is what January marks. I’m also not good at sticking to my own goals. If you’re one of those people that sets a resolution and doesn’t fall off the wagon, then I salute you. But what about the people like me who struggle to maintain the momentum and willpower that’s needed? I love the idea of a new year heralding a brand new and improved version of myself, but the reality is, human beings are not alarm clocks or computers, and we can’t simply fast forward time or press the reset button on our lives. I believe that real change is something that must be driven by constantly checking ourselves and reshaping the way we actually think and act, rather than a dramatic “New Year New Me” decision that will inevitably run out of steam. I think if we set ourselves more realistic aspirations and goals then it’ll become much easier to achieve them, without having to completely bypass the person we already are.

I will try to change my negative view of January, which I think will be much easier without putting myself under the “New Year New Me” pressure. I don’t want to go into yet another year feeling like a failure, and instead want to celebrate the fact I’ve made it this far. I think it’d be a much better habit to get into to use January as an excuse to reflect on all the things I have achieved, rather than the things I haven’t.